And in walks Jason

He DID arrive. He was there! And he was a little shocked to see me hooked up to an iv, and all ready to go. I've never been so GLAD to see his cheerful, handsome self. Another cheerful face I'd just begun to look at for what would be a very long day was Nicole's. She was my midwife, and thank heaven...I LOVED her. She was just amazing. Just what I needed. At first sight I thought oh crap, how on earth is someone who's 25 years old going to know how to do this? She looked VERY young. At one point I did ask her how long she'd been doing this and she said, "a few years." It felt like having a girlfriend in the room, which cooled me down a little. I could do this. At times it made it feel like I really was just chatting with a friend, not actually IN labor (those must have been between contractions).

Jason at one of our prenatal classes. I was the only wimp in the room who didn't want to feel the electric pulses of the "tens" machine- Jason tried it!


When I saw her one of the first things I said was...EPIDURAL. "I just want to be clear up front that I KNOW I want an epidural." She was very low key about everything and said, "oh sure, we'll get you an epidural." I heard her ordering one as she stepped out into that hallway. I'm glad I liked her, because had I not, I'm really not so sure the day would've gone so well. I started freaking out a little when the pitocin kicked in. I didn't want the morphine. I just wanted the epidural. And morphine, besides gas and air, really was the only thing offered. So I started up on the gas and air. Never mind that I hadn't slept the night before and it was now 9am, the gas and air made me feel like I hadn't slept for a week straight and like I was dizzy, confused, but still in pain. It was a mild pain killer. I'm not sure if they give it in the states, but basically you can't use too much, because sooner or later your hand gives out from being so deliriously out of it that you drop it. That happened to me a few times. I have a picture of myself with it somewhere, but was nice enough to myself to not put it on flickr, so I have no clue where it is.

The face of this woman is what I looked like (exhausted), but the actual gas and air I had had like a tube thing that you suck on instead of a whole face mask.


A few hours passed, and I asked again about the epidural. Apparently there was only one antithesis on and he was with a woman in c-section. He'd come when he could. Meanwhile, I wasn't sure I could handle this (that's putting it mildly). I was getting sick from the gas and air, my lips would've killed for some chap stick, and every time the midwife left the room I threw up. I have no clue how many times I threw up or dry heaved that day. It was now about noon, and still no sign of the epidural. I kept asking nicely, tears streaming down my face. My eyes were closed. I knew at this point, no- I cannot do this. By this point though we were feeling really comfortable with Nicole our midwife and she kept going back and forth for cups of tea. She'd ask Jason every time she went, "Can I bring you a cuppa?" She was so cute. She checked me again and by noon I was at about a 6. My feet were gripped to the end of the bed. It's how I managed the pain, squeezing them against the bed. Jason took a picture of my feet at one point. So at this point I had 2 ivs in. One for the pitocin, and 1 for the fluids I was getting.

Here is me in labor about 1/2 through- feet gripped to the bed. I'm so glad Jason took this picture because at the end I was rushed out of there and I can't imagine never seeing the room Christian came into the world in again!

At 2pm, having labored hard for 6 hours, I was about to crumble with only the mild pain meds, not to mention the pitocin pumping through my system. I opted for the morphine, which was a great disappointment as well. If I felt out of it with the gas and air, I was about to feel that times about 50. I do remember feeling good enough to sit up and put my hair in a ponytail. They readjusted the heart monitor and decided the one strapped around my belly wasn't working well enough, so they attached one to Christian's head inside me. Now that was strange. His heart rate began to drop a bit from the morphine and Nicole didn't say much about that. She just had a concerned look on her face every time she checked it. Meanwhile, my fingers and toes were getting exceedingly bigger from all the fluids.

At 4pm, the epidural guy came in. He was young. He was good looking. He was my hero. Why did everyone seeing me in this state have to be young and good looking? I bent over on the side of the bed (I was at an 8 at this point), which was no easy task. Nicole was lecturing me every now and then..."sit still hon, you want this to work don't you?" I simply could not sit still, which I think is why the epidural only took on 1 side- my left. That was a strange and awful feeling. He left, and I was still feeling all the pain on 1 side. Rumor was, he felt awful, and although he was greatly busy was going to try and make an entrance to re-try. He came back and apologized profusely, and tried again. It took! I was at a 9 at that point. It took about 30 minutes before I was to push. Part of me wishes that I hadn't gotten it, because I went the majority of labor without it...but hey, it worked for the last hour 1/2 of 12. Oh, and I was happy. Nicole was eying the read-outs and I was having huge contractions while talking and laughing. I loved her even more than I had before with the good news that I'd just had a contraction and hadn't even felt it. HALLELUJAH!